Sunday 8 December 2013

Mass Effect Deception

What the actual. I got this book from the library, because i'm obsessed with Mass Effect. It was awful. A reasonably okay storyline but with filler and poor writing that had me itching to get out a black marker pen (last time I had this was when I read Shelters of Stone. I now pretend that book wasn't written).

Rubbish fan fiction with little to recommend it. The prose was bad, Anderson acted out of character, it was moralistic, which is pretty out of tune with the Mass Effect morality (which is either pragmatic or somewhat Old Testament). A kid murders a guy who kills his girlfriend and Kahlee & Anderson are all 'tut tut, naughty boy' about it. Yeah... because Anderson and Shepard neer kill anyone, and certainly not for reenge (Kai Leng, for example, one of the most satisfying kills in any game I'e eer played).

I'm not the only one - Penny Arcade lampooned it -

And fans more dedicated than I compiled a Google doc about the errors in Mass Effect Deception.

My Favourites:
  • Quarians don't wear Environ suits.
  • A homosexual character is suddenly a heterosexual character.
  • Kai Leng (an extreme racist) is shown flirting with aliens. 
  • Singularity makes people explode.
  • Cerberus have a PR department.
  • After breaking into Anderson's apartment Kai Leng eats some cereal, then clears up after himself. It just made no sense. 

The author engages in a lot of 'Telling Not Showing' - a rookie mistake that would get you marked down in a creative writing course. If I had submitted this during my degree my professor would have called me in for a word.

It feels like Dietz tossed this off (pun intended) in an afternoon. While chugging beer. And watching the football.